Those first few minutes of awakening...After a blissful night of sleep that gentle tap on the door sounds like death. And then my father's voice announcing that its 5.30 am. This is the time of the day for those abysmal philasophical meanderings; suddenly my head is flocked with questions regarding the meaning of life, my purpose in this world while all the time being convinced that I am meant for so much more than being up at 5.30 am and bumping into walls with a drooped head and eyes half closed while solemnly swearing to myself that I will quit work next month and retire into the wilderness away from pestering humans taking my beloved bed with me so that I could finally sleep in peace.
After that, every movement is mechanical. Eyes still closed heading into the bathroom, fumbling around for the toothbrush, the toothpaste. Hands feel like wound up robotic sticks pushing a reluctant toothbrush around a mouth that is too sleepy to resist. All the time reminiscing the uncertainity of life and the futility of it all - the teeth, the toothbrush, the toothpaste and all. And then I grope my way downstairs and make my morning tea literally with my eyes closed. Standing in front of the stove waiting for the tea to boil, I am quite unaware of the usual morning clutter and chatter that goes around in the household at that time of the day. People know better than to try and strike up a meaningful conversation with me during that time. All they would get is a groggy yet menacing look swathed with indifference coated in an uncomfortable silence. Tea in hand I would stagger once again to my lair, close the door and still clutching the tea mug I would wander around aimlessly in pajamas while a million random things flit in and out of my head. These are the aimless hours of the day when my mind loiters in that blissful area between sleep and consciousness when the mind cannot quite discern the difference betwen fantasy and reality. And suddenly reality would win over and land a well aimed slap at my mind and then I would get reminded of the real purpose behind my rude awakening. Work.
Followed by a fully fledged mission oriented fast forwarded day at work, when its finally time to go home, I would not want to go thinking of the other hundred and one things I had not had teh chance to finish. On my way home, those tasks would haunt my head and I would go through them over and over in my head till bed time, strategizing, plan making, conjuring up a hundred different ways to get it done. Then I would go to bed impatient to go to work the next day, eager to finish off those tasks as quickly as humanely possible.
And then the whole circle would follow. Sigh....such is life these days.
Weekends are non-existent and I'm longing for a day, just one single day to spend by myself, for myself.
Lately I've been feeling a sort of an impatience, the kind of impatience that could only be cured by one thing - travel. Blessed are those who can afford the luxury of travelling extensively without a care in the world. I used to be one of the blessed ones, free roaming, the camera, notepad and me and then writing of my adventures, reliving those moments over and over in my head. Now, I am confined, settled is the word used more commonly in society I suppose. But I suppose I'm not the settling kind, never have been, up to this very point. Wanderlust is my governing planet and this monster has to be appeased at least once in a while.
Oh well.....let us see.
After that, every movement is mechanical. Eyes still closed heading into the bathroom, fumbling around for the toothbrush, the toothpaste. Hands feel like wound up robotic sticks pushing a reluctant toothbrush around a mouth that is too sleepy to resist. All the time reminiscing the uncertainity of life and the futility of it all - the teeth, the toothbrush, the toothpaste and all. And then I grope my way downstairs and make my morning tea literally with my eyes closed. Standing in front of the stove waiting for the tea to boil, I am quite unaware of the usual morning clutter and chatter that goes around in the household at that time of the day. People know better than to try and strike up a meaningful conversation with me during that time. All they would get is a groggy yet menacing look swathed with indifference coated in an uncomfortable silence. Tea in hand I would stagger once again to my lair, close the door and still clutching the tea mug I would wander around aimlessly in pajamas while a million random things flit in and out of my head. These are the aimless hours of the day when my mind loiters in that blissful area between sleep and consciousness when the mind cannot quite discern the difference betwen fantasy and reality. And suddenly reality would win over and land a well aimed slap at my mind and then I would get reminded of the real purpose behind my rude awakening. Work.
Followed by a fully fledged mission oriented fast forwarded day at work, when its finally time to go home, I would not want to go thinking of the other hundred and one things I had not had teh chance to finish. On my way home, those tasks would haunt my head and I would go through them over and over in my head till bed time, strategizing, plan making, conjuring up a hundred different ways to get it done. Then I would go to bed impatient to go to work the next day, eager to finish off those tasks as quickly as humanely possible.
And then the whole circle would follow. Sigh....such is life these days.
Weekends are non-existent and I'm longing for a day, just one single day to spend by myself, for myself.
Lately I've been feeling a sort of an impatience, the kind of impatience that could only be cured by one thing - travel. Blessed are those who can afford the luxury of travelling extensively without a care in the world. I used to be one of the blessed ones, free roaming, the camera, notepad and me and then writing of my adventures, reliving those moments over and over in my head. Now, I am confined, settled is the word used more commonly in society I suppose. But I suppose I'm not the settling kind, never have been, up to this very point. Wanderlust is my governing planet and this monster has to be appeased at least once in a while.
Oh well.....let us see.
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