Lady Grouchalot goes to the polling station

Today is the national manicure day! The only day in the year(and the only country in the whole wide world)that you could get a manicure for only your teeny-weeny little finger that would remain black and blue for weeks afterwards,only at the cost of one little cross on a piece of paper! And you know what they say about things that come cheap.They always have a hole in them.But in this case,a big purple blotch that looks like a crow just shitted on it (after eating two dozens of purple permanent markers of course)

First things first,to avoid the mishap of bearing a scandalously ugly little finger for the next few weeks,it was crucial to apply two-three coats of clear nail varnish on your poor little finger nail.This done,a politically ignorant,not to mention utterly indifferent Lady Grouchalot heads out to the polling booth armed with her national ID and her voting receipt(in which her name was grossly misspelt.Sigh....) as a result of parental coaxing and threatening.There were people all over the place who would mutter/whisper to themselves numbers and signs as they walked on by other people who had come to vote which confirmed to me the level of insanity in politicians all over again.We however,made sure not to vote for the names and numbers mentioned by these mad people running all over the place (Talking to oneself is a sure-fire sign of insanity no? I mean,we can't let the system be overtaken by the clinically insane,as mad enough as it already is!) Anyway there were two-three people at the entrance itself who would wave at the crowd (displaying various numbers from their fingers as they do so) go out of the way to greet you and smile in such a way that you could actually count the number of teeth in their mouths.One even waved exorbitantly (without showing any numbers this time) as we left the place,with purple fingers and all.Chweet noh? Anaaaaaaawwwwwwww....... :) 

Pity that this will be the last time we see them(Unless of course you had laser spectacles which could see through the blackened windows of their Prados and walls of expensive hotel suites after they come in to power) Sigh.....We shall miss the nice men who wave :(

With these pleasant thoughts,Lady Grouchalot and Mother Dearest had to stand in a queue labelled "ladies" while Father Dearest headed off in another direction which said "Men"( not "gentlemen" heehee...) It's discriminating really,the separation of the sexes at the polling booths. Even though Father Dearest went in a while after us,we saw him voted and ready for departure while we were still having our names called out and stuff.Yes,for the first time in a long time,Lady Grouchalot heard her full name with initials called out loud and to be quite honest,it sounded pretty out of place after years of being called in shortened forms of the original version,pet names and all.

And then came the manicure from hell.I stood there and silently prayed to God to let that menacing looking lady sitting there all smug and armed with the universally dreaded felt pen (which looked more like a lightsaber to me) go easy on me. I saw her assaulting Mother Dearest's poor little finger with gritted teeth and a determined hand and felt fear creeping through the veins and ending up at the back of my neck.Soon it was my turn to get guillotined and let me tell you,as she bid me to place the neck of my poor little finger on the guillotine board and wrenched off the cap of that cursed little,manipulative thing,I was muttering silent prayers of mercy to the election Gods.Vivid,frantic images of a fat,hairy executioner slowly sharpening his ax was constantly flashing in front of my eyes as she pulled the marker out in slow motion and started battering my poor ol little finger.The nail was quite slippery and wouldn't hold the gaudy purple color(thanks to the good ol clear nail varnish,bless its soul) so she charged at the skin area instead and I watched horrified as the felt tip bled out a grotesque purple on to the finger and inundated the innocent pinkish skin with rabid fervor. At last she stopped digging the felt tip in and looked down at her handy work with the smug look of a rapist looking down at his ruined and shattered victim.I really felt for my finger.Poor,poor thing!

Well,there were about four-five symbols on the paper the unsmiling lady next to the purple murderer handed over to me(which reminded me of the exam papers that we received during our school days) Lady Grouchalot (who couldn't care less about any of the signs or politics for that matter) just breezed ahead and placed the all important cross next to the most attractive looking and the most original symbol on the paper(which she found towards the bottom of the paper) She was happy with the choice.It was quite a pretty symbol which she had never seen before :)

The purple misery on the finger nail washed off with the nail polish remover but the stuff on the fleshy part of the finger shows absolutely no sign of parting with the skin.Well,in the end, everybody(including the waving,smiling gentlemen,the purple assassin and the unsmiling exam paper distributing lady went home happily while my poor,innocent little finger,who hasn't done anyone any harm,suffers in purple agony.Sigh....Life is not fair...... :(