Daddy Dearest came home from Yalpanam yesterday.He brought back red onion and green chilly.Needless to say,Mother Dearest was delighted.It's been a long time since any of us saw a red onion.
He's been to Jaffna so many times before on duty and each time he would bring mangoes,grapes,that strange sort of flat-as-a-deflated-ego wadeis that look like somebody had sat on them before frying,palm roots and palm jaggery as a costume.But this time,he had more valuable stuff on his mind. Mangoes and grapes are the luxury food of the past it seems.The statues of the present kings *cough* rulers of Sri Lanka shall be sculpted as being fed with red onions and chillies rather than grapes and whatever it is that kings *cough* rulers eat.How the times have changed.
Looking at the pile of photocopied notes cum photocopied God-knows-what on the table,getting depressed and feeling sorry for ourselves.If we collected the money that we have spent on photocopies during the whole course of our gloriously torturous university years,we could have bought a couple of photocopy machines by now and started a thriving business of our own,making money out of wretched,miserable souls just like us.Yes,we don't have lecturers but we have plenty of assignments to submit.It seems that these days a lecturer is the equivalent of a photocopied paper/papers/whole piles of books.They are interchangeable and one can easily be replaced with the other.The bitter truth about the free education I suppose? Or maybe its just the way things are done at UOK.I dunno.
It used to be better though.Life used to be easier earlier and everybody seemed so kind and supportive.That was the golden age of our department me thinks.With the depart of one extremely supportive and incredibly understanding lecturer who was much more than a mere lecturer to us,everything started falling apart,everything.That was the beginning of the end.
No regrets though.What doesn't kill you only makes you stronger.Precious lessons learnt throughout the whole experience so yes,the eternal optimist in me whispers ever so softly that everything happens for good and it usually does.Let's just hope that we don't end up in neck high shit by the time we are done.
Wish I could be insensitive,wish I could not care about other people's feelings.Wish I could shut out other people so that their actions/words don't hurt me.Wish I could remain indifferent whatever life throws at me.Sigh........Life would have been easier then.Much,MUCH easier...............
Feeling so lost and confused.Nothing makes sense.Let alone the assignments,life itself doesn't make sense right now.But then again,WHEN did life EVER make sense? You are born alone,you fight your own battles,you make your own messes,you tidy them up yourself and ultimately,you end up digging your own grave and lying in it,dying alone as well(if you don't die in a plane crash and the like with hundreds of others in it that is) Question-How does a girl who falls, no,actually JUMPS eyes wide open, down a rabbit hole, plummeting into chaos come out unchanged? Answer-She doesn't (courtesy Little black book 2004) She comes out bruised,sullied,exhausted yet hardened up and wise enough not to jump in to rabbit holes again.She will watch out for rabbit holes,pot holes,man holes(pun totally intended) and holes of all sorts and do her very best to avoid them like Justin Bieber with or without the plague.Truth is,once you fall down a rabbit hole,you should come out the same end from where you fell in.Or else you'll end up a hundred gazillion times more lost and confused than you started with in the first place.
It's not easy and it most certainly is never pleasant,but the least you could do is try.Lady Grouchalot is positive.Not sure whether the positiveness is the result of the flabbergastingly colossal amounts of unadulterated caffeine consumed within the past couple of hours or the positive angel finally fluttering her flimsy wings and whispering sweet,mint-flavored nothings in the ear.Aaaargh! Coffee always makes me go hyper and make me wanna dance along with the penguins to the tune of manamana...yeeeey!! :D
Me and my unpredictable mood swings,I know......... Sigh.......
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